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smk_network[She wasn't going to do this... she really wasn't going to be that guy... but her talk with Aziraphale last night had worried her. If he was cracking under pressure or whatever the fuck that was she can't just leave all the newbies in the lurch.
What the fuck is wrong with her? She actually cares?! Fuck! It's okay. Just remember what Aziraphale said about teaching and leading and shit. But if she's gonna do this for real she's gonna do it her way.
So she sat on her couch in front of a plain white wall, nothing fancy. A framed candid photo of her and Rosabella hangs off to her right. Dressed in a comfy plaid shirt, she gives the mirror a lop sided smile before she begins to speak.]
Hey everyone, I'm Eleanor and I don't usually do this so I'm just gonna get straight to the point:
Alright, so, here's the deal. I'm not gonna sugar coat this for you - this place isn't the best. Some parts of it downright suck. But it doesn't have to completely suck. I know all you newbies are probably getting sick of hearing about everything. There's a loooooot of info. Take it from someone who hates reading anything longer than a couple'a pages, I getcha. So here are some cliffnotes:
-You can get some food for free at places in town - it's good shit, too. That'll help til you get a job or someone to freeload off of.
-The Emporium has everything you might need - ask for me or Michael, we'll help hook you up.
-Right now everything is fucking haunted. Don't fuck with the ghosts or they'll fuck with you... I speak from experience.
-Watch out on the full moon. Anyone who's a monster class starts looking and acting pretty wiggy. And... don't take it personally, they can't help it. On the new moon it's the exact opposite, so be nice.
-Don't do any missions til you've at least tried to do magic... they suck ass if you don't know what you're doing. During my first mission, one guy blew up one of our tents and made the other one invisible. Seriously. You try finding an invisible tent in the dark. It's not fun.
[No offense, Doctor. It was the best example she could think of...
She sighs, raking her hair back from her face. Realizing how she must sound, her smile turns a little apologetic.]
Listen... I know it's a lot. Trust me. I didn't believe a single word of it until I saw the corroded with my own eyes and actually did magic for the first time. But you're not alone. If you want help with magic and shit you can go talk to Aziraphale if he's around. He's one of the good guys and super easy to talk to. But you can also come talk to me. I've been helping with training, but I've also been giving a lot of advice lately. So I'm gonna put out a blanket offer to everyone, no matter how long you've been here:
If you need someone to train with, talk to, hang out with, bitch at or whatever, I'm your girl. I work at the Emporium, but hit me up through the mirror any time. I'll buy the first round of drinks. Booze, tea, coffee, milk and cookies, a thimble of something, whatever.
[She pauses, biting her lip]
Uuuuhhh yeah that's about it. [Another pause] Fuck, I don't know how to end this without sounding either really lame or super awkward... except now I just made it awkward by saying that. [She facepalms] Just... bye. Okay? Bye.
What the fuck is wrong with her? She actually cares?! Fuck! It's okay. Just remember what Aziraphale said about teaching and leading and shit. But if she's gonna do this for real she's gonna do it her way.
So she sat on her couch in front of a plain white wall, nothing fancy. A framed candid photo of her and Rosabella hangs off to her right. Dressed in a comfy plaid shirt, she gives the mirror a lop sided smile before she begins to speak.]
Hey everyone, I'm Eleanor and I don't usually do this so I'm just gonna get straight to the point:
Alright, so, here's the deal. I'm not gonna sugar coat this for you - this place isn't the best. Some parts of it downright suck. But it doesn't have to completely suck. I know all you newbies are probably getting sick of hearing about everything. There's a loooooot of info. Take it from someone who hates reading anything longer than a couple'a pages, I getcha. So here are some cliffnotes:
-You can get some food for free at places in town - it's good shit, too. That'll help til you get a job or someone to freeload off of.
-The Emporium has everything you might need - ask for me or Michael, we'll help hook you up.
-Right now everything is fucking haunted. Don't fuck with the ghosts or they'll fuck with you... I speak from experience.
-Watch out on the full moon. Anyone who's a monster class starts looking and acting pretty wiggy. And... don't take it personally, they can't help it. On the new moon it's the exact opposite, so be nice.
-Don't do any missions til you've at least tried to do magic... they suck ass if you don't know what you're doing. During my first mission, one guy blew up one of our tents and made the other one invisible. Seriously. You try finding an invisible tent in the dark. It's not fun.
[No offense, Doctor. It was the best example she could think of...
She sighs, raking her hair back from her face. Realizing how she must sound, her smile turns a little apologetic.]
Listen... I know it's a lot. Trust me. I didn't believe a single word of it until I saw the corroded with my own eyes and actually did magic for the first time. But you're not alone. If you want help with magic and shit you can go talk to Aziraphale if he's around. He's one of the good guys and super easy to talk to. But you can also come talk to me. I've been helping with training, but I've also been giving a lot of advice lately. So I'm gonna put out a blanket offer to everyone, no matter how long you've been here:
If you need someone to train with, talk to, hang out with, bitch at or whatever, I'm your girl. I work at the Emporium, but hit me up through the mirror any time. I'll buy the first round of drinks. Booze, tea, coffee, milk and cookies, a thimble of something, whatever.
[She pauses, biting her lip]
Uuuuhhh yeah that's about it. [Another pause] Fuck, I don't know how to end this without sounding either really lame or super awkward... except now I just made it awkward by saying that. [She facepalms] Just... bye. Okay? Bye.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-10 02:06 am (UTC)And I do think that this was a good idea. Coming here is really weird and there's a lot of new stuff you knave to learn so having the important stuff all together like this is really nice.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-10 02:35 am (UTC)Hey thanks, kiddo. I'm glad to help.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-10 03:37 am (UTC)Are you going to do this every time new people get brought in, do you think?
no subject
Date: 2019-10-10 05:32 pm (UTC)No idea. If not me I hope other people will. I'm sure people will get sick of hearing from me every month.
[She laughs]
no subject
Date: 2019-10-11 05:36 am (UTC)[Sad fact of life when you're a kid; things you say don't tend to carry quite as much weight with most adults.]
Maybe we could take turns? That way anybody who wants to can have a chance to do it.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-16 04:07 am (UTC)That's a good idea. And, hey, it's okay if not everyone listens to you. It just means you gotta find those who will and talk to them.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-25 07:19 am (UTC)Anyway, maybe we could make a list of people who want to do it. That way we'll know how many people there are and everybody'll be able to know if it's their turn or not.
no subject
Date: 2019-10-25 02:22 pm (UTC)[Please say yes please say yes. She doesn't want to do it.]
no subject
Date: 2019-11-02 01:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-11-02 05:34 pm (UTC)Okay, yeah. That works. I know a few people who probably wouldn't mind helping.
no subject
Date: 2019-11-03 01:41 am (UTC)OK! Then we'll do that. Let's talk again in a week or two, and we'll both say who we talked to and what they said, alright?
no subject
Date: 2019-11-03 10:24 pm (UTC)[
Then shit exploded and they never talked about it again, the end.]no subject
Date: 2019-11-04 02:39 am (UTC)Leia will bring it up again sometime in November, once no new people turn up.]Alright then. Til later!
[Leia gives a little wave before ending the call on her end.]