Black Cat Heart Attack

[isthatacactus]

[it is 4 am, but she has a question. She has spent a while trying to get the answer on her own but to no avail. And so...]

Hi there!

I bought everything.

[she holds up all the available black cat items]

What does that mean?

Comments

[isthatacactus]

I don't want to return anything. It's mine. You can't have it. [said cheerfully] That's an interesting experience.

[takeitsleazy]

Humans are a lot more possessive of things. So... those upgrades to your programming made you feel like you needed to not miss anything special, but now that it's all yours, you don't want to part with any of it, even though you don't need all of it.

[he gives a little chuckle]

It doesn't make any sense, but that's part of what makes it a human thing to do. The thing is... Now that you know, you can choose not to buy everything the next time something like this happens. Mistakes are humans' reboots. Every time we make one we gain another skill or get better at one.

[isthatacactus]

I do not require the upgrades to make me human. I don't understand how it can help.

[it doesn't seem to be helping]

I will buy everything the next time, because I am not human.

[in fact, she might buy more]

[takeitsleazy]

I know you don't, but ... [they're there anyway. at least a couple. same as him. and it's a real pain. he's going to have to Talk To Someone about this]

You're going to need money for that, Janet. Just sayin'. Why do you want to buy everything the next time, too, without even knowing what 'everything' is going to be? Seems a little silly.

[isthatacactus]

Because then I will have it and it will be mine and if I need it I have it. It's not silly to have things. I can't make things reliably but I can have things. I want things. I will get money to get more things.

[takeitsleazy]

[with that, her angle on it becomes clear. she's used to creating anything she needs....so her immediate solution is to buy and own everything in case she ever needs ANY of it.]

Oh my.

[he clears his throat]

So um. Janet. The thing is... there's so much stuff that having one of everything just in case is the silly part. Most humans only buy or get things as they need them. Or borrow them from people who have them but don't use them all the time.

[isthatacactus]

But what if I need it and it's not there? Then what? If I have everything then it will be fine.

[takeitsleazy]

Then it's easy enough to get it. You just... have to wait a little instead of having it right away.

[isthatacactus]

[she processes this] Waiting takes so long. And it's so uncertain. How do humans do it?

[takeitsleazy]

It bugs the hell out of me sometimes, too. I had to do it when we started the Neighborhood, to see if the - [he's still not sure when she's from, how much she knows. he should probably fix that] - plan was working.

Speaking of the Neighborhood... say, Janet, what's the last thing you remember from before you ended up here?

[isthatacactus]

I had just gotten you files for Eleanor... but I think it came out wrong.

[takeitsleazy]

[his eyes widen and he leans back away from the mirror] WOW. I mean - WOW. That is ... that is a really long time ago for me, Janet. Geesh.

[he blows out a sigh, blinking and shaking his head in that dottering way that he has when he's completely stunned]

I am completely stunned. When I get back, I should ... tell you a few things, I think. Important ones.

[isthatacactus]

Okay! There. There. [she doesn't know quite how to approach this so sympathy seems the best way to go for the moment. But there is something about time... time....] Is there an IHOP? [she could catch up?]

[takeitsleazy]

Unfortunately, no, we can't get to an IHOP from here. The mirror is kind of the closest thing we've got, and that only works when people come in. Tell you what! When I get back we can go to the Carnation Cafe and get pancakes, and then it can kind of be like an IHOP.

[isthatacactus]

And then you will tell me the bad news...

[takeitsleazy]

It's not bad news, Janet. I'm just from a spot on the Jeremy Bearimy that's a lot farther along than you. And I should tell you some things that happened. They're mostly good things, actually.

[isthatacactus]

Okay! I will wait for the good news.