Video / Lamplighting

[bigbadrose]

They say you never forget how to ride a bicycle, yeah?

[Rose pans her mirror down from her waaaaay tall bicycle.]

I really hope that's true, because I don't much like my chances of getting back on it if I fall. Wish me luck!

[She sets out, and so far, so good.] Okay, so anyone else get jobs yet and all that? Give me sound my first night out, since I didn't wanna risk my cybud up here.

[Exclusively for her "roommates," there's a pair of cupcakes, one for 12 and Michael respectively. 12's is banana with edible ball-bearings, and Michael's is devil's chocolate with a paperclip. Both have messages.]

Comments

[bigbadrose]

[Oh, it's totally funny, Rose agrees.]

[AND STILL LAUGHING!!! And she's so tickled, she manages to fire off some light for a few of the streetlamps.]

Windchimes...

[She's dying. She loves it.] So what's the Medium Place?

I'm fine, ta, how's the cupcake?

[takeitsleazy]

Delicious! What makes it devil's food? Or were you just calling it that? More important than that, or the Medium Place ... How did you just do that?! Mine still don't work!

[bigbadrose]

Sinfully delicious.

[Sly smirk and fingertip to her nose.] We also have angel hair pasta, and angel food cake, but devil's food's always better. Don't tell Aziraphale.

Merlin said my magic is tied to my emotions. So I guess when I'm laughing a lot, it's really easy! But that's going to make battling... pretty difficult, huh?

You should try... when you're protecting people. [Holds up both hands.] That's not me flirtin', even if it is why I like you. But you were able to get the barrier off, and tell off Hades when you were protecting others. I think that's probably your best strength, yeah?

Hey, Michael?

[takeitsleazy]

[that observation catches him so far off guard that he doesn't even realize she was trying to ask him something]

Uh, yuh -- Yeah? What?

[bigbadrose]

[Kicks her bike back up, and darn. No amount of wishing is going to get her back up there. Oh well, back to the ladder she goes. Definitely need to ask the Doctor about making her a built in one on the bike itself.]

I really do have a thing for you. I just realized. All joking aside. Is that gonna be a problem if I promise I won't act on it, unless you want me to?

[Walking the tall bike, is really really funny, and while Rose isn't having another fit of giggles, she's very highly amused about it.]

[Normally, she'd leave it there, but she feels like she should buy him more time to process it.]

I used to meaninglessly flirt with Jack and stuff; well mostly banter. he'd flirt, I'd tell him to dream on. But if ya need me to back off, I will.

[takeitsleazy]

Unclear.

[he says it the same way Janet would, flat yet cheerful.]

No one's ever... "had a thing" for me, as far as I know. I can certainly assure you I don't have one for you, but that you definitely match up to people I've come to consider friends. Isn't there some Zoning thing that is really horrifically insulting? That's ... not what I mean. I should probably say that, right? Ugh. You have to understand, this is all an extremely recent development in the scheme of things.

[bigbadrose]

[Laughs and bites her thumb.] Okay, relax. I've already gotten the "for a human" speech like eighty times from the Doctor. Don't break your brain trying to think about it. It's a door, or a window, just leave it open, see what happens. Maybe the breeze will be good for you. If there's things you don't like, let me know when that happens. Sounds fair?

[More laughs.] Wait, so all those times Eleanor tried to seduce you, it wasn't... legit? Damn, that's harsh. For what it's worth, the only thing I want from you is just you know... this. [Still more laughs.] Being able to laugh again. It's nice. For awhile I didn't think I ever would again.

Oh, but -- do us both a favor. Don't try to scare me. The more you try, the more I want to do -- [Her expression flickers, trying to figure out how to phrase it.] Rascally terrible things. Anything to confuse you and take you off guard, and act in ways you can't predict. You know how the younger Doctor summoned flaming hats? Well, I'm a bit like that too. My element isn't... so chaotic, but my head and heart are.

Keeping me at arm's length is easy. Just do it for your sake, not mine.

[takeitsleazy]

She was trying to, uh.

[he sighs. if he could show Eleanor how cruel he'd been to her and Chidi, and not lise them ... maybe there was hope. maybe he was worrying over nothing. even so, he lowered his voice, because he'd promised Crowley he'd try to be more discreet about it in case anyone was listening in]

Rose, I need to level with you on something. Those neighborhoods I built... They weren't part of The Good Place.

[bigbadrose]

[Rose keeps waiting for the big reveal.]

[....]

[Oh. Oh. That was it.]

[Rose nearly blurts out, "No, shit," but luckily her empathy overrides any bluntness. To Michael this might be some big secret. Like how the Doctor could sometimes get super squirrel-y about not being human. Or even being the Doctor. Good reasons, and with Aziraphale around...]

I knew that, buddy. Even if devils is racist, they're not going to be getting gigs designing parts of heaven, kind of defeats the purpose of even having two separate things.

I also know that your Janet was stolen. No worries, so was -- well, never mind.

Although when you mentioned how she had to be rebooted a lot and stuff, was that because she kept figuring out stuff was bad? Because the TARDIS doesn't deal well outside the timestream of the Doctor's universe, so I assume it was a little weird for Janet in a trap neighborhood, yeah? Doable. Just as you can finagle the TARDIS in other universes, sometimes, barely, but it takes a lot of work.

[takeitsleazy]

[he blinks rapidly, tilts his head, and licks his lower lip while that processes. she knew. and she's not flipping out. what. ... it figures. he sighs.]

Actually, it wasn't Janet. It was usually Eleanor. Except for the one time it was Jason. That one hurt. ... I had to keep wiping their memories and restarting, so my boss wouldn't think I failed and force me into retirement. ... Eventually I realized that it might work better if the four of them were in on it.

[bigbadrose]

Jason?

Jason the locked himself in a safe to rob a place, Jason???

Uh... What happens in retirement?

Good plan, hot-shot. How'd that work out for you?

[takeitsleazy]

[it's his turn to regret this being a public conversation and get defensive, all of a sudden. he knows Jason figuring it all out was a low point, a personal insult, and sets his jaw. then she asks about retirement, and his stomach curdles with dread. but her calling him hot-shot is the last straw, because she's ... she's not allowed to insult him like that. she's just not.]

F.Y.I, it was on the way to working out very well, before I ended up in this sad excuse for a Neighborhood with an even sadder excuse for a - a -

[oh]

Just get back on your bike and do your stupid job. Oh, and by the way: soulmates aren't real! I made it up! For the Neighborhood!

[there, that's better. now. has Aahz found amd drank all the alcohol?]

[bigbadrose]

[Aw, she meant it as a compliment, but she can see he's really burned up about it.]

Hey. Meet me as soon as I finish, I'll buy us some drinks and you can tell me every structural flaw with this place, okay?

You're cute when you're steaming.

And I'm actually really impressed. Most people wouldn't have the guts to change tracks or tactics. It takes real ingenuity, yeah? Remember what I said about immortals being kinda pathetic?
Even the Doctor was getting prickly because he was including himself in that, I think.

Don't be so hard on yourself just because you're starting from scratch here. You're further than you think.

[takeitsleazy]

I know I am.

[his voice is quiet, sullen, a perfect picture of a sulking child who is trying to pretend they're mad so they'll be left alone with their embarrassment]

I got a human starter kit and everything.

[bigbadrose]

[Very very cute.]

[Her only regret is that she's not already there in person, and she's definitely debating ditching work to check on him.]

What's that come with?

[takeitsleazy]

It came with ...

[maybe it's the fact that Hoodie Day is nigh. or maybe he really just has too many feelings. hint: it's the latter. just trying to recall everything in that stupid little box is making him feel like someone is scooping out space below his ribs with one of those serrated melon ballers]

None of it mattered. So ... It all did. That was what it came with.

[understanding. the fact that something doesn't have to mean something to anyone else. just to you]

[bigbadrose]

[Rose nods sagely.]

Paperclips.

You're kind of like Mr. Clippy yourself, yeah?

[takeitsleazy]

[he clears his throat. straightens his bowtie. pushes it all down, even if just for now.

smiles.]

I see you're trying to change the subject. Would you like some help with that?

[bigbadrose]

[She bursts out laughing and has to hold onto her bike very carefully not to fall over again from giggling so hard.]

That's perfect!! I didn't know you knew him!! What is he, some part of... the bad place just to torture grammar nazis???

[takeitsleazy]

No, humans did that one all on their own, but someone in my office had it installed as part of her 9D CAD program. You know. For laughs. It just took me a minute to remember. Heh.

I don't know quite what it is about paper clips. I just... They're so good. Simple.

[he fidgets with the bracelet a moment, and realizes that now he's the only one who knows its story. that doesn't seem fair. he holds his wrist up to the mirror]

Eleanor made me this, yanno. Before I ever had to reboot the neighborhood...

[bigbadrose]

Paperclips are good. Useful for picking locks, or holding things together, or as bracelets.

So how come you still wear it?

[takeitsleazy]

[paperclips are his bananas, Rose. if it were possible he'd invent a paperclip daiquiri]

Because it's the first thing a human ever gave me. I was thinking about something too much - or, well, more like I was pretending to, to stress her out - and instead of getting freaked out, she ... said I needed to not think so much. That I needed to have fun. And she made me this. And then she showed me karaoke.

It really wasn't what I expected. At all. Any of it.

[bigbadrose]

That's humans for you!

Satan would have gotten out of his prison if he just wasn't trying so hard to terrorize us, and cooperated instead!

So do you like karaoke?

[takeitsleazy]

He's got some grudges. And Daddy issues.

[he shrugs]

Karaoke? Yeah, it's great. I told the Doctor, I know all the words to something called "Blaze of Glory". He said he plays the guitar. We were going to find a bar but we ended up making pancakes instead.

[bigbadrose]

Sounds right. Well, if you don't mind a third party, I'll come with you, we can make a day of it.