Mirror / all the swearing

[ace_of_hearts]

[Just in case things weren't bad enough already with the blood moon and Sanderson sisters, and kidnappings... Main Street erupts in a series of explosions. It turns out the sudden cold, rain, and blood moon with Ace's fire out of control, doesn't mix well with gross magic and booze mini-stills.]

Fuck fuck fuck shit fuck damn fuck sorry, don't-- [More explosions rocket off behind him.] Fuck.

I need... Shit I don't even know. Help maybe. I'd offer booze, but as you can see... [Winces as a high-pitched whistling shriek goes off and he frantically tries to get it to NOT EXPLODE.]

[....]

[...]

[Whew. At least one is safe. Maybe!!!] It doesn't like the weather. [It = Ace, actually. It's all Ace.]

Gross magic should be easier in a full moon, right? RIGHT?! Fuck everything.

Comments

[trashylittlesecret]

Shit, seriously? That's fucked up, man. I'm sorry.

[he knew a thing or two about getting cuffed once in a while when someone in the house was in their cups, for sure, but ... education by fist, that sounded downright archaic, the sort of stuff that happened to people a generation earlier than his. 'boy ah'm gon' learn ya' kind of shit.]

I don't blame you for staying the hell out of it, then.

[ace_of_hearts]

Wellllllllllllll... it was going to get me killed sooner or later. It's how I died eventually.

Man this weather sucks, right?

[trashylittlesecret]

[that was a heck of a thing to unpack, Richie thought, then decided that he didn't want to deal with it, and just left the whole suitcase where it was.]

Yeah, seriously. I gotta say, this week's doing a whole lot to improve my view of the place.

[Sarcasm: Tool For The Ages]

[ace_of_hearts]

[Ace knew there was a reason he liked Richie!]

It's usually more boring!

Wait, is that a good thing?

[trashylittlesecret]

That it's more boring? Or that I was being totally sarcastic? In the same order: yes and yes.

[ace_of_hearts]

[More giggles :3]

Okay good!

Maybe you'll get lotsa material from this? Your opening line can be like "So the witches turned me into a sandwich, and I was like, hey when did everything get taller?!" [Or you know... don't take joke advice from Ace. Really don't.]

[trashylittlesecret]

YeeeaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhI think that one might need to get workshopped a little, first, but, uhhhh. Good starter, bud. Good starter.

[ace_of_hearts]

That bad, huh?

Wellllll, good thing I'm a captain not a comedian. I'm a fighter not a lover. Wait.

[trashylittlesecret]

[he thinks of the graffiti on Eddie's cast] It can be both. Well, maybe not the captain and comedian part.

[ace_of_hearts]

My roommate's both!! He's a clown captain. His crew was mostly circus freaks. And they have a really cool lion that can jump through flaming hoops!

[trashylittlesecret]

[it's a good thing sandRiches don't actually have expressions beyond googly eyes. but he's still silent for a moment. ... guess if he ever gets brave enough to ask, they're not going back to Ace's room to fool around]

I'm ... not a big fan of clowns.

[ace_of_hearts]

Why not?

[trashylittlesecret]

[even as a sandwich, he shifts uncomfortably]

Because they scare the shit out of me is why. First because of a dumb movie I snuck into that I wasn't old enough to see, and then on a worse note, there was this kid-killing asshole demon where I'm from that liked looking like one. I crushed his heart in my bare fucking hands, I hated him that much.

[ace_of_hearts]

Fair enough.

[Ace shrugs, because that's a good reason.] Buggy's not like that. He can't help uh... his face. People in my world are a lot more... [Makes faces, not that they're audible, he just has no idea how to express it.] comical??? I don't mean like they're funny. I mean they're more... extreme? WAY more extreme. Because we have fishmen and giants, and zoans -- uh they're like people who get animal powers. So it's more like people are out of the comics. I never read a lot of comics, because psssh... you couldn't get them where I was. But sometimes, even though my prey was always adults, they'd have some. And Thatch and Marco tried to tell me about them. They're all propaganda though, so they're kind of stupid.

Fuck.

Point is, Buggy's a good guy. But I'll see if I can like... buffer the worst of the clown parts if you ever wanna meet him or shit, okay?

A really good guy.

He helped protect my idiot bro when I died. Even in Hell. And he knows my parents! Pops and even my Mom, and about... my blood... and he said, it's total crap that the world thinks I'm a demon... he says I'm not, but I don't mind if they do. I really don't. [He doesn't exactly sound like he doesn't mind.]

[trashylittlesecret]

I'm'a call bullshit on that last bit, but we'll come back to that. If you can vouch for this guy ... mmmmh. Maybe. Gimme some time to get settled, okay? That bare-handed heart crushy thing was literally half an hour before I got here.

Now what's with this demon shit? If you mind, you should fuckin' tell them so, not lie about it.

Cw: Ace's birth, child murder, genocide, pregnancy ending in death etc.

[ace_of_hearts]

Yeah definitely! Take your time dude!

And damn... I mean I landed here right after my heart was punched by magma, but I think it's more surreal. I wouldn't normally get along with darkness or black hole or gravity types, but Rose is so awesome, and she's a dragon. Even if we were just fighting. I gotta check on her again when I get you somewhere safe.

[R U distracted from the demon thing???????!! No??? Well fuck.]

[Deep breath. Sigh. Where does he begin????]

[He leads up the stairs in the apartment building to head for Richie's room so he can put him on a table, even if he's not looking him in the googly eyes! And tries to wash his hat off. If you can lick another man, you can tell them what everyone else already knows!]

Crowley calls me the Antichrist. I had to keep the secret of my birth my whole life, and they still killed me for it in the end.

Has your world ever had someone who was supposed to destroy the world just by existing? That's me. Even if I didn't do it personally, they thought my Pops would do it for me. That's bullshit. They were just scared of the demon in me. And they should be.

The propaganda comics I mentioned, right? They've got tons of them. About the heroes of the Marines and the evil of pirates, and... The devil incarnate. I can't even say his name. [Laughs and shakes his head.] It's so stupid. But I guess even I hate him too. More than all of them.

I took my mother's name, Portgas. Because she made a great sacrifice so I could even be born without so much suspicion. My shitty Grandfather helped her, he's not such a bad guy, he came to see me in Hell too and stuff. [Shrug.]. I don't mind being a demon, but I'm not the son of the devil, I'm Whitebeard's son.

[Shows off the tattoo.] He's my father. The best father in the whole world.

Maybe it sounds stupid, but that's why I can't wear shirts here yet. He told me not hunt Blackbeard, but I did, against orders, and he still came to get me. It just pisses me off that my world still thinks -- tch, they don't matter. The people who do matter, know better, that's good enough.

[trashylittlesecret]

[it's good to be back in his room, but he's glad Sarah Jane is off somewhere else: he still hasn't figured out how he's going to explain this to her. even so, when you're a sandwich on a kitchenette counter, there's not much you can do but listen.]

Crowley. He's the asshole that turned me into a mouse when I got here. So I wouldn't listen to him on principle. [he shakes his head, focusing on the aspects of the story he can understand, instead of the ones he can't, drawing some paralells as he goes.]

Everyone's got family drama, and I know a little bit about picking better family than the one you were born with. I had a gang of friends, back home, the way you had a crew. The Loser's Club, we called ourselves, 'cuz that's what everyone thought we were. Kind of a 'fuck you' thing, y'know?

[ace_of_hearts]

Yeah, Crowley's a demon and not terribly easy to get along with. I mean, I get it though. Sort of. If you really believed you had to kill a baby, or a couple thousand, just to save the world... collateral damage, right?

Yeah! That's like my world and us with monsters. Like Little Oars Jr. wouldn't hurt a fly, but the whole world calls him a monster, Pops too, and me.

So they were your nakama, huh?

[trashylittlesecret]

[it's amazing how little of that he processed. he's just going to chalk it up to being a sandwich. and new. and a sandwich.]

My whattama?

[ace_of_hearts]

Your crew. Family. Chosen family, like you said. They're with you on a journey through life and you'd die or kill for them.

[trashylittlesecret]

... Yeah. Yeah, that's exactly what they are. And I would.

[he's glad sandwiches don't have much range of emotion.]